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Tuesday, November 10, 2009

PEACE and CONTENTMENT in Your Homeschooling Year!



Okay, okay...are you feeling it too?

A bit rushed?

A little too busy?

Somewhat overwhelmed?

Thinking, "Gosh, I had such good ideas and a set plan for what I envisioned for this homeschooling year, and somehow, it's just getting all out of whack"?

Well, first take a deep breath and realize: YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

I believe that this little scenerio begins to creep in right around the mid-Autumn season...family activities are at a high...thoughts of the upcoming holidays begin to spin their yarns in our minds...plans for gatherings, budgeting for gift-giving, desires for staying CENTERED and focusing on the HOLY aspects of the season all start to take over our minds; which then makes it very difficult to stay on top of our school plans and lessons.

HALT! WAIT JUST ONE MINUTE!

It is NOT too late to get back on track!!!

Consider the following ideas and perhaps one or more of them might help you in regaining a sense of PEACE and CONTENTMENT (which equals: JOY) in your homeschool!

Note: I really think that those families who do not homeschool can also benefit from the general idea of the thoughts below, adapting it to their family lifestyle.

1) KEEP IT SIMPLE!
It really helps to stick to the basics and fundamentals of learning in our daily school lessons.
A blessing to homeschoolers is that there is a PLETHORA of GREAT and SOLID teaching aids, materials, supplements, and resources out there for the taking; much of them FREE!
The problem occurs when we "can't keep our hands out of the cookie jar" so-to-speak.
We start out the year with a nice, neat, organized plan and set goals...and as we go along, we see this, that, and the other, and think "OH! What fun! How wonderful! We need to do that!"
So try to re-think your overall plan for a moment and KEEP IT SIMPLE. Decide where you want your focus to be for the family as a whole, as well as for each individual student's academic and personal needs, and the provide the main things that will help you to nurture and address those needs. Leave the extras and the more complex things aside. A good education does not mean "She who teaches the most subjects or offers the most experiments and lab studies, WINS".

2)DEVELOP A PLAN!
If you did not already do so at the beginning of your school year, now would be a good time to develop a set plan of ideas, goals, and lesson structures for the rest of the school year. Some people do well with a "general plan", writing out each subject and what their overall focus for that subject will be each quarter. Others like to work with a more itemized plan, structuring each lesson and writing assignments in a daily lesson planner. Either way is fine, as long as you HAVE a plan. Trying to "wing it" for an entire school year, especially if you are teaching more than one grade level, simply breeds frustration and confusion and leaves a homeschooling mother feeling like a failure. Make your plan YOUR OWN, according to your unique family's needs...and then STICK TO IT!


3) MAKE CHANGES IN BETWEEN SEMESTERS ONLY!
Sometimes we find that even with the best of intentions and planning, some things are just NOT working for our students...whether that means that a certain text isn't what you thought it would be, or a scheduling idea is not going as smoothly as you had hoped...perhaps a change in family dynamics (the birth of a sweet baby, an illness, a family crisis) has "muddied the waters" and is making it difficult to stick to the plan you originally created. THAT'S OK! THAT HAPPENS!
THAT IS NOT A PROBLEM! However, I strongly encourage you to keep things as they are until there is a definite BREAK in your lessons...a holiday vacation maybe, or in between quarters or semesters. If you are dealing with something that is not only NOT working, but is detrimental to your homeschool in some way, then it is better to do away with all together...but STILL DO NOT ADD ANYTHING NEW until you reach a stopping point. If the issue is one that's more about personal preference, and no harm is being done in continuing, then just pull up those boot straps and see it through until you have a clean break and can then begin fresh when classes resume.
Changing midstream is inconsistent and only adds to a student's frustration when they feel they have to keep adapting and re-learning things they've already begun. It's not good for us mothers either for we have enough to keep track of and handle without tossing new things into the mix along the way.

4) KEEP YOUR FAMILY STRONG!
Outside activities and extra curricular things can be well and good for a family from time to time. Keeping up on chores and sticking to the lesson plans for school is worthwhile too. But don't forget to BE A FAMILY...ENJOY TIME TOGETHER...NURTURE ONE ANOTHER! We must take time to be away from the busy pace of the world and simply play, and pray, and spend social time together as a family. This, I think, plays the biggest part in creating a school year of PEACE and CONTENTMENT for it is in FAMILY TIME that our hearts and spirits can grow in holiness the most. A strong spirit tends toward a strong mind and body...and homeschooling is all about educating THE WHOLE PERSON: body, mind, and soul!

5) KEEP MOM IN GOOD HEALTH!
In addition to keeping the family strong, a homeschooling mother needs to pay special attention to her OWN well-being. ( I am NOT advocating an "I must come first and tend to my own needs first because I need to be happy and well in order to nurture my family" mentality...those who read my blog often understand that I believe TRUE JOY comes in placing ourselves LAST, not first, on the list!) However, I DO recognize the fact that we, as women, wives, mothers, teachers, "set the tone" (as mentioned in yesterday's post) and therefore we need to make sure that we stay in tip top shape: spiritually, intellectually, physically, and emotionally so as to be at our very best in order to meet the needs and demands of our households. Here are some good pages for you to read about keeping yourself in good health!

6) DISCIPLINE!
Just a mother sets the tone for the family on an average day, so too does the demeanor and behavior of the children play a HUGE part in whether or not our homeschools exude an ambiance of PEACE and CONTENMENT. Let's all just face it : unruly behavior in children can tear apart a homeschool, a family, and a marriage far more quickly than we would like to admit.
I think we try to overlook these things for several reasons:

A) We try to let kids be kids and we realize that they are not mature; therefore we "choose our battles" and try to let the small stuff go.

B) (probably the bigger reason) We realize that in tackling this issue, MOST of the responsibility will fall upon our own shoulders...and we are TIRED.

With that in mind, we need to PRAY and ask God for the strength and energy needed to stay on task in disciplining (teaching) our children in order to inculcate the virtuous behavior we want to see in a godly family. Then, we need to give it our all...each step of the way, gently guiding and INSISTING on behavior that is conducive to a study environment, a family environment, a CHRISTIAN environment. It CAN be accomplished with LOVE and CHARITY...but it takes both time and effort and our attentions and focus MUST be on raising our children (NOT the 10,000 extra things we hope to do and accomplish on the side)

The last thing on my little list for building PEACE and CONTENTMENT in our homeschool year is this:

7) COMBINE GRADES WHERE POSSIBLE!
It just makes good sense, that in planning our lessons for our homeschools, we take the children who are very close in age, and group them together for generalized subjects such as: History, Geography, Science, Religion, Art, Music, etc...
This allows you to teach ONE lesson and then assign customized projects, activity sheets, reports, and/or quizzes that are age and level appropriate for each child.
WHAT A TIME SAVER!!! I do this ANY time it is possible. And, it's enjoyable too!
The kids LIKE working and learning together and it makes for great "group discussions and 'classroom' humor along the way. Not having to teach the same subject 3,4, or 5 times a day lessens the workload, leaves time for other things (like chores!) and naturally creates a more peaceful environment because Mom is not stressed trying to cram everything into one learning day.

What thoughts and ideas would YOU like to share with others about regaining PEACE and CONTENTMENT in our school year? I invite you to leave us a comment today and discuss this topic!

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Hearts for Home: One of my favorite memes over on A Thankful Woman's Book of Blessings today. Click the Cornucopia in my sidebar to visit !

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Monday, November 9, 2009

Do the NEXT THING

Ever feel so overwhelmed with things to do that you don't even know where to begin?

I heard this little "mantra" if-you-will, on a Christian radio station once, and I have implemented it with GREAT SUCCESS in my daily life.

Provided that you have begun your day with prayer to the Lord, asking HIS WILL to be done in your day...then rather than become anxious and frustrated with the 100 things you need to do...simply DO THE NEXT ONE...when you pause for a moment, WHICH thing comes to mind as needing your attention first? Whatever that is....DO IT...and forget the rest until THAT thing is done. Continue in this mindset as you go through your day and you will find yourself beginning to "live in the moment" more, which helps to maintain a feeling of inner peace and joy!

We CAN'T do it all! So stop trying to DO IT ALL AT ONCE...simply: DO THE NEXT THING!

Today is MUSIC MONDAY and A SIMPLE WOMAN'S DAY BOOK over on A Thankful Woman's Book of Blessings. I love these two memes! Come on over and see my entries and follow links to others too! CLICK HERE!

And now I offer you this short meditation for your Monday. (If you click the bouquet of roses in my sidebar, you will find a page where there is a NEW meditation EVERY SINGLE DAY to supplement and enrich your personal quiet time and prayer! It is my gift to you to thank you for participating in benmakesten with me!) Feel free to copy that page and print the meditations out for your personal use each week! Here is today's reflection:

Each moment brings me an opportunity to grow closer to you by serving others. Help me Lord, not to waste this chance by wallowing in self-pity and pride. Rather, I wish to deny myself and look to those around me so that in them, I might see JESUS...and by serving them with a joyful heart, I can SERVE YOU, MY GOD for you have said that all that is done to each of these, has been done to YOU.Help me then, to be kind...and giving...caring and compassionate...helpful and resourceful...gentle and meek....forgiving and loving...IN YOUR NAME AND FOR YOUR GLORY

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WELCOME to MARCIA, from BLESSED MOM'S SIMPLE HOME (I LOVE that title!!!) who is the newest FRIEND OF BENMAKESTEN!

I am so glad you have enjoyed your first visit here Marcia, and I look forward to hearing from you in the comments! I can't wait to check out your blog too...but I'm sorry that you have already had a negative situation with a follower in just TWO WEEKS of blogging...that's icky :(
I hope you will get some time to peruse past posts here on benmakesten, as well as check out some of the great links in the sidebar!

You'll notice a couple of conveniences for your use there as well...one is a Google search bar which searches THIS BLOG ONLY...so you can type in a few keywords and pull up posts on that topic.
The other is the search bar underneath that which allows you to shop online right here from BENMAKESTEN! This actually also helps US because anything you purchase through that search bar allows us to earn a referral commission; so please keep us in mind whenever you are preparing to shop online and do it here! (OR...visit our other store which you can find by clicking our website button at the very top of this page!)

Nice to have you with us Marcia, and may BENMAKESTEN bring you much JOY!

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Movie Monday: The Butter Cream Gang in :
Secret of Treasure Mountain

We LOVE the Butter Cream Gang movies!

This movie is about friendship, self-esteem, and DOING THE RIGHT THING: INTEGRITY
There's a bit of mystery AND adventure and the best part is: the good guys WIN!

You can get the DVD or VHS (We still have one, so I thought perhaps someone else might too!) for under $3.00 if you buy used...or the higher price for NEW if you CLICK HERE



In my sidebar, you'll find a link about 2/3 way down the page, for Feature Films for Families. This is a company which guarantees WHOLESOME viewing for the family...in the more than 15 years that we have been purchasing from them, we have NEVER been disappointed!


Sunday, November 8, 2009

MOTHERS SET THE TONE


Have you ever noticed how the tone and atmosphere of your home is so closely related with THE MOTHER?

Sometimes, I think, we'd rather not admit that, but I truly believe that most of the peace, harmony, and JOY in a family's day-to-day living (or lack of it for that matter) follows suit with MOM'S demeanor and how she is approaching life.

Though I don't really like to acknowledge it, most of the time that there is discord or unruliness or laziness or disorder and chaos in my home (YES, it happens HERE TOO!!!) I can usually trace it all the way back to....you guessed it....ME!

UGH! That hurts even to type it!

It's true, however, and the first step toward restoring family peace and unity comes in accepting that fact and then making the changes needed from within in order to encourage the positive attitudes and willing service that we desire in our daily family living.

Ever notice that the younger kids seem to have a few negative traits that weren't present when you were a young mother of one, two, or maybe three? I have found that (in my own home, at least) this arises out of my own inconsistency in parenting, my own fatigue and laziness, and my own "passing the buck" to someone else to handle moments that I should be handling myself.

Now don't get me wrong here. I TRULY BELIEVE that one of the most BEAUTIFUL aspects of large (What is large? My husband says it depends upon whom you are standing beside, lol!) families is the interconnection and service to others...older children helping/guiding/mentoring younger ones...this is God's way and it is a beautiful way. However, my point is that many times, a tired and worn out mom can take advantage of that way, and instead of tending to things that require her maturity, she will call out to an older child to go "check on that problem". Too much of this can breed some pretty bad habits throughout the family. Parents get frustrated...Littles become whiny and needy...and the older kids are "out of their league" trying to handle things that is beyond their scope of abilities.

How does this all translate in a practical way?

Well...I think that we, MOTHERS, need to realize that WE are the HEART of the family.
We must set an example of JOY, of INNER PEACE, of WILLINGNESS TO SERVE, and of HOSPITALITY toward our family members...but we also must set out expecations and standards that WE will make sure are being upheld in our home and family life.

Here are some ways that I think this can be implemented:

1) When delegating a task, choose the YOUNGEST person capable of carrying it out...this prevents us from placing too much of a burden upon our eldest children...and it also allows the younger children to feel needed and appreciated.

2) Do the tasks we are able to do ourselves!!! Don't just pass it on to the kids "because you can".
If you can do it...then do it...and more preferrably, bring one of the younger children along-side you as you do whatever it is you're setting out to do...this is a wonderful way of training and mentoring (often mentioned in the book Raising Godly Tomatoes...a GOOD read!); and it also shows the kids that you would not ask anything of them that you are not first willing to do yourself. (I think this is what makes my husband such a wonderful manager...instead of wearing the shirt and tie that the other managers wear, he has always opted to wear the workman's uniform of the company in management colors instead...and is always the FIRST one to "do the dirty work" right along-side the men when needed. It is clear that the laborers are consistently willing to offer better performance and more effort when working with my husband as opposed to others who do not share in the "I will not ask anything of you that I'm not willing to do myself" attitude!)...We mothers can learn from that example and will find our children much more willing to work when WE HAVE SET A JOYFUL TONE in this area!

3) Be consistent and handle the big stuff. How many times have we given in to our fatigue, and, upon hearing a disruption in another room simply called out some form of reprimand because we are too tired or disgusted to GO IN THERE AND DEAL WITH IT? (This is also written about extensively in the book I mentioned above.) We must accept our responsibilities to discipline during the day. Think back to when you had one or two children...they were so obedient and well-behaved because we were normally RIGHT THERE to handle any problem that arose.
As times goes on, and the family grows in size, so do the chores, needs, duties, and umpteen issues that need our attention...and I feel that these moment-to-moment problems tend to be pushed by the way-side...which, in the end, breaks down the peace and harmony in the home because we did not "nip it in the bud" or handle the issue the way we should have. Don't send another child to handle what you should handle yourself!

Children are capable of understanding and doing so much! If we, as mothers, will set the proper tone and be willing to give 100% to our vocations, then we will be delighted with the outcome...not to say there won't be problems or trials along the way...but the overall atmosphere of our home will reflect the standards and expectations that we have laid out for our families.

Here are two more articles about "setting the tone" and "giving 100%" that you might enjoy!

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SAVORY SUNDAY: ( a recipe)
Homemade Cranberry Sauce!

2 bags of whole cranberries

1 C orange juice

1 C sugar

1/2 to 3/4 C crushed walnuts
Bring juice and sugar to a boil on the stove, stir well as you go

Add cranberries and continue to gently stir

In just a few moments you will hear the berries begin to "POP"

When this happens, remove from stove and pour into glass or ceramic bowl
LET SIT TO ROOM TEMPERATURE
Gently stir in walnuts CHILL BEFORE SERVING note:
If you add the walnuts when the cranberry sauce is still too hot, the nuts will turn black...ICKY!
This is DELICIOUS alone as a side dish or with Cool Whip topping as a dessert!

Saturday, November 7, 2009

RECUPERATION


That's pretty much what my poor husband looks like at the moment.

We are slowly getting everybody back to their strength here.

The horrid, hacking, hard-to-breathe cough has been the worst of this whole flu...well...that and the TERRIBLE headache that comes with it.

We are glad the weekend has arrived.

We will be doing much of nothing...resting...napping...sipping hot drinks and broth...letting the kids get a little fresh air outside...

Jake has carried out the wonderful good deed of washing all surfaces and knobs of our house with hot water and ammonia.

All bed sheets, covers, towels, and other linens have been successfully laundered.

Time to be tucked in our little home together...time to nourish...time to refresh...time to recuperate.

And we MUST get well for the coming week's BIG RAIDERS PLAY-OFF GAME for JACOB!
WOO HOO!!!!!! GO NUMBER 57!!!!!!!!!!

There's a brand new meme on A Thankful Woman's Book of Blessings today! Stop over there by clicking the horn of plenty in my sidebar!

Hospitality...I've been pondering this...you can read about it here.



Friday, November 6, 2009

BENMAKESTEN WILL LINK YOU! (2 posts today)

Hello! Glad you've stopped by BENMAKESTEN today!

This special post is here to share some of BENMAKESTEN's favorite links with you!

You might find that you are familiar with some of the landing pages of these links.

Others might be brand new for you!

Either way, I hope you will enjoy CLICKING AWAY at the following as much as I enjoy sharing these links with you!



MORE FUN IDEAS! (Easy gift and craft ideas, lesson supplements like book reviews and poetry prompts, science projects, holy day and holiday traditions and customs, and more! A little bit of everything all rolled into one!)

FREEBIES GALORE! (A link for a free e-book on starting your own business...school awards...stationery...links to sites that offer a NEW freebie EVERY SINGLE DAY, and more!)

THE CATHOLIC CORNER
(quality audio CD's to help teach the Catechism, hand-made jewelry created by a family that prays for the wearer as they make each piece, suggested book lists for homeschooling, as well as personal enrichment, and noteworthy book titles from other Christian authors to enrich your homeschool lifestyle)


FOR YOUR TASTEBUDS
(delicious and easy recipe ideas and links to sites that specialize in frugal shopping plans and cooking healthy and tasty meals for large families)


HOMESCHOOL FAITH AND FAMILY LIFE STORE ( items to make those Quiet Moments special, curriculum, books for personal reading pleasure for all ages, tasty snacks and grocery products, Kindle systems and Kindle books (what a GREAT invention!!!) , board games and toys especially geared to family time, movies, kitchen and housewares items, electronics, school and office supplies and MORE!...all of your online shopping needs from one convenient location! Just click the "powered by Amazon" link in the upper left of the page to go to the main site for items you can't find on the shelves!

MY FAITH CORNER
(Ever wonder what the difference is between dogma and doctrine? Then, you'll enjoy this short video! Looking for some explanation on a few common misunderstandings about the Catholic Faith? You might be able to find it here! If you HAVE a question you'd like answered just send it in!)

THE HOMESCHOOL LOUNGE (Looking for interaction and fellowship with other homeschooling moms and grandmothers? Searching for new and creative ideas? Need a bit of advice? Over 10,000 members share the JOY of homeschooling on this wonderful site owned and managed by a lovely homeschooling mother from Louisiana! Great giveaways! Links to etsy shops and businesses of homeschool moms! Book and Curriculum Reviews! Music, Photos, even your very own page to receive visitors if you like! LOTS OF GOOD THINGS FOR ALL HOMESCHOOLING MOMS!)

INSPIRED BY OTHERS (a collection of writings that I have come across in the blogosphere which have been inspirational and uplifting to me )

HAVE FUN on your little LINK TOUR, provided today by BENMAKESTEN, LOL!



A REVIEW!

I was so surprised (and GRATEFUL) recently, when I visited Blessings for the Day blog and came upon a post there that was a REVIEW for the e-book I have written, "I Surrender"!

Although I've already sent a private note to Karinann, the blog author, thanking her for her very positive and generous review, I also wish to extend my thanks here publicly on benmakesten!

You can read Karinann's review of "I Surrender" HERE!

If you'd like to read a few sample pages of this e-book, there is a link to do so in the sidebar here on benmakesten :)

I was blessed in many ways through the writing of "I Surrender" and it gives me great joy when I read that it has been a blessing to someone else as well!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

THE KIDS' TURN! (second post today)

Would you like to share your children with us a bit...some of their talents, musings, writings, drawings, photos?

Our Creative Art Lesson this past week has been creating Personal Craft Journals together...what fun! I always enjoy when I assign a general project to the whole group because it really emphasizes each student's unique gifts, thoughts, and style; each one carrying the same theme but varying in the ways in which they carry out that theme.

As I mentioned earlier this week, we captured this wonderful craft idea from Ruth who writes on Daily Divine blog and is also being featured as the special guest on Daily Blessings Special Feature Interviews this week! (Click the link for Daily Blessings website in my sidebar and then click the Interviews with Others page once you get there!)

Here are a few sample pages of our Personal Craft Journals:


(We thought that Sarah's page above was SO sweet...especially when she answered "I am trying" with: "to not be sick"...and "I am learning" with "to not be afraid of the dark"....awww...TRYING to not be sick as though she is responsible for that!!!! SWEET CHILDREN!)





Each student included the following page titles in their journal:

About Me
Things I Like
I Am Truly Thankful For
A Few of My Thoughts (This was done in the style of prompted questions such as: "I am thinking", "I am hoping", "I try", "I am praying for", etc...)
Something I'd Like to Share

Each journal page was punched with three holes and all were bound together with yarn to create a lovely booklet!

Looking for a nice family craft to enjoy a slower pace today? Why not get started on your very own Personal Craft Journals?!



Come on over to THIS PAGE and you'll find the answers my kids gave to THIS QUESTION OF THE DAY: "If Jesus came to visit you today, what would you want to do with Him?" Browse the rest of that page and you will find some other treasures from my kids!

If you'd like to let YOUR kids in on the fun, ask THEM that same question and send me their name (or screen name), a photo if you like (not necessary, but adds a nice touch) and their answer and we will add to the OUR TURN (Kids' Page) on our Daily Blessings Website. You can use the CONTACT ME button in my sidebar for your convenience!

As stated in the beginning of this post...any artwork, poetry, prose, musings, jokes, anecdotes, etc...from your children ARE WELCOME on our page! This is a secure way to allow our children to let their talents shine a bit, as well as interact with others by enjoying the entries of their peers!



Wednesday, November 4, 2009

The BIG PICTURE Lesson


Recently, as I was pondering our current state-in-life (which, in the past year, has changed greatly for us in that the second of our eldest two children left home and our baby BEN is now 2 1/2 and clearly much more toddler, than "baby"...shhhhh...DON'T tell his mother that!!!!!) and how we have gone from tending to the needs of the six babies sent from God in seven years...and not being able to take a moment even to blow our own noses at times....to the place we now find ourselves, where there is more time for activities, crafts, family projects, studying, learning new skills, visiting, etc...

As I assessed our strengths and weaknesses and considered ways in which I might like to implement change in our homeschooling program, I found myself asking "What's the most important lesson I wish for them to learn"?

Ironically, no matter how many times I turned that around in my head, or rearranged the phrasing, the answer still came up not having much to do with academics. Each time I considered this question, I felt strongly that the answer was:

"I wish for them to know, love, and serve the Lord to the best of their abilities, using the gifts, blessings, and talents that He has given to each of them to the fullest of their individual potentials".

Granted, academics holds an important role in being able to accomplish those goals...but all in all, what I realized in this little meditation is that CHRIST IS THE LESSON...and LIVING LIFE AS A FAMILY WILL TEACH IT.

Many times, like earlier this week, someone will get ill, or a crisis will occur wherein keeping up with the best of our intentions as far as curriculum plans goes becomes near impossible.

I have learned, during those times, NOT to panic...just to SLOW DOWN, and lighten the load a bit...setting the texts aside, focusing on essentials...and taking the opportunity to engage in a more "gentle art of learning" for a while.

However, I take for granted at times, that the majority of the learning my children experience, is being taught naturally just by being here at home together each and every day. I consider this a great blessing.

My children have had a CLOSE-UP view of what a new mother goes through from hour to hour in a day, they see what it truly means to run a house-hold, to plan and budget and shop for 10 out of 12 people at home...they have a HANDS-ON opportunity to care for babies, to teach their siblings, to help organize, design, and implement new schedules and systems...and they have also had a first-hand look at some of the more difficult times a family endures...the trials of parenting, the financial struggles of raising a family on a single income, the many attempts at new lesson plans or ways of doing things that DON'T work...

Instead of being away from home for more than 6-8 hours in a day, they are here, seeing their mother live the life that she has told them since their beginning is so important, worthwhile, and sacred...They see their imperfect mother...and SEE HER THEY DO...the GOOD AND THE UGLY...trying her best to center herself in Christ every day and share His love, mercy, and goodness with them as they learn all of the wonderful things that will help them grow into godly adults one day.

I often tell young moms who are feeling overwhelmed in their homeschooling..."Just give them a love of learning...and THEY WILL LEARN".

One of my wise friends reminds me often that they do not need to accomplish a lifetime of education in the 12 years that we instruct them in our homeschools. If we instill a true love of learning within our children, they can go on to learn all of the things that we were incapable of teaching them once they leave our homes. As long as we give them the fundamentals and the tools...God will make up where we lack in the rest!

CHRIST IS THE LESSON...and FAMILY LIFE TEACHES IT

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One of the newest Friends of Benmakesten, RUTH, from Daily Divine is the special featured guest on DAILY BLESSING INTERVIEWS this week! CLICK HERE to find Ruth's WONDERFUL interview where you will learn more about her AND glean MUCH from her insight and wisdom in the homeschooling and family lifestyle! She and her family have had the privilege of living in ASIA...and she has a great passion toward helping those less fortunate than herself...Her family has even created a COMMUNITY LIBRARY where they have over 1000 books available to the community for sharing!!! Stop by to meet Ruth today and leave her a comment under the post!
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Keep your eyes on the positive! That's the theme for Small Successes, the meme on A Thankful Woman's Book of Blessings today...check it out! Just click the Horn of Plenty image in the sidebar here on my blog!


IMPORTANT BLOG NOTE (second post today)

Why a picture of a ROAD BLOCK here?

Well, let me first say that I can not begin to express to you the JOYS and BLESSINGS I have received by getting to know and interact with the FRIENDS OF BENMAKESTEN...(i.e. Followers to this blog)
I have met some of the most wonderful, creative, kind, insightful, wise, holy, and joyful people via this wonderful cyberspace adventure and hope to continue to do so for a LONG TIME TO COME.

With that said, I am sad to say that today, for the very first time (and I hope for THE LAST) I have had to BLOCK A FOLLOWER to BENMAKESTEN.

Usually, when I see that benmakesten has a new friend, I click on the avatar and try to find out a bit about the person...that's fairly easy when the person has added links to their own blogs and websites in their profile... I like to visit those links and get a "feel" for "what they are about" if-you-will...and then I like to feature a nice little WELCOME in my next post to let them know that I'm glad they have joined us...and also invite benmakesten readers to peruse their sites as well.

When a person "hides" their profile, I usually feel a bit of a "red flag"...However, through some Google searching and hunting, it is likely possible to track down a profile and links somewhere on the internet.

That is what I did today when I noticed a new avatar that seemed a bit "different" on benmakesten.

I was indeed able to track down a profile and found that this new follower had quite an extensive list of personal blogs and websites...one of which was GREATLY offensive and pornographic in nature.

Though I DO have a small "disclaimer" at the bottom of my sidebar here on benmakesten (If you have never scrolled down that far, I encourage you to do so now so that you can read it) which explains that I do not have time to FULLY explore each and every link or website linked to benmakesten...I also feel an obligation to protect my family, myself, and benmakesten readers to the best of my ability...

Therefore, when I find something that is morally offensive connected to a visitor, reader, or follower of this blog, I WILL BLOCK IT!!!!!

Please note that this is a FAMILY-ORIENTED BLOG...It's entire purpose (as explained in the blog description at the top of the page) is to uplift, support, and encourage people by sharing glimpses of our own Catholic Homeschooling Family... While I am very OPEN to welcoming and allowing those of other faith backgrounds to share their thoughts, ideas, and customs with us here...I will NEVER allow something directly ANTI-Catholic or MORALLY OFFENSIVE in nature to be posted or linked to my blog.

(If you FIND something that fits that description while you are browsing the links in my sidebar, posts, or in the profiles of benmakesten followers, PLEASE ALERT ME RIGHT AWAY! Thank you!)

If you are considering following this blog, and you host sites that contain items of such a nature, then my advice to you is: DON'T FOLLOW THIS BLOG because I WILL BLOCK YOU!

I do find it a bit curious as to WHY someone whose premise is so clearly contradictory and opposite of benmakesten's would WANT to follow this blog (and a part of me wishes that I could allow them to stay so that perhaps they could be led in a new direction in life)...but my loyalty and priority are to those who already follow and read benmakesten and find it to be a wholesome activity....I WANT TO KEEP IT THAT WAY!

If this offends someone, I'm sorry...I have tried to word this post in a most charitable manner...and perhaps if you scroll down to the other post for today, you will understand that my family "IS MY FAMILY" and we need to simply "BE WHO WE ARE"...and if that means that I have to block a follower now and then...then that is what I will do.



Be Who You Are


As I have stated many times before here on BENMAKESTEN, I feel that one of the greatest blessings, which can also be one of the greatest CROSSES, in homeschooling, is the opportunity and ability to BE WHO YOU ARE as you go about your lessons, duties, and family life each day.

I feel that the ideas in this post are applicable across the board and not just beneficial to homeschoolers; although I also think that homeschoolers, in particular, will do well to consider the following:
One of the ways that I've noticed that the opportunity/ability to "Be Who You Are" becomes a cross (rather than a blessing) for homeschooling families is that many of us fall into the trap of looking outside for "comparison", "approval", "validation", and "enrichment".

There is a natural ebb and flow to homeschooling life...ups, downs, failures, successes, adventures, challenges, joys, sorrows, etc... Any who choose this form of education come to find that in order for it to be a "success", we need to understand that A) Home Education is VERY different from outside school-education, and B) LIFE is happening ALL THROUGHOUT the school day and we need to learn to keep the priorities straight and the focus where it needs to be IN THE MOMENT.

The way that this plays out on an average day will be unique and varied from family to family. Therefore, it is quite futile for one family to look toward another in order to assess their OWN situation!

It is wise to remain open-minded and accepting to change and improvement. When we see something someone else is implementing in their home study program that we feel would enrich our own family life, we can take the idea and adapt it for ourselves. However, when we see others doing things, and rather than learning from them or being enriched by them, we use it as a way to degrade ourselves or "prove our failures", then we have gotten off-track and are headed for nothing but frustration and disaster.

God calls each homeschooling family to a special purpose and mission. Every family must discern WHAT that mission/purpose is for themselves. What He asks of my family will most likely be very different from what He asks of yours...Our job as homeschoolers should be to help each other see our individual callings more clearly, and to uplift, support, and encourage one another in living that out on a daily basis.

We need to have the courage to BE WHO WE ARE...and we need to have the maturity to analyze and judge our own homeschooling situations for WHAT THEY ARE...NOT what someone else's is!

This carries over in a more personal way when it comes to family convictions/standards/morals/lifestyles.

Time and time again, I read threads and posts on websites where parents are seeking advice as to whether or not to allow something in their home that they feel isn't what they want for their family...but either a relative has offered it as a gift, or they themselves feel pressured to allow it so that their families would be "more like the others". A case in point recently, was a mother who posted on the Homeschool Lounge saying that the thought of having "gaming devices" (such as WII or Nintendo) in her home for her young children made her nauseus, but she was unsure whether she could turn down this gift from her mother-in-law for fear of offending her.

That is why I decided to publish this post on the topic. BE WHO YOU ARE! In seeking and carrying out God's will in our individual lives, we can NOT go around worried about whether our decisions will "offend" someone. If those decisions are focused on our family life, and we have discerned that what we are doing is BEST for our family, then the ONLY person we need to make sure we are not offending is GOD. Beyond that, we must always behave CHARITABLY (especially if we are turning down an offered gift from a well-meaning relative or friend), but we must also have the COURAGE needed to stand by our convictions and not give way to conforming to outside opinions simply so we will appear to be "more like the others" or so we will not "offend" them.

The point is not even whether we think that certain games or music or movies are good or bad in and of themselves...the point is: YOU KNOW YOUR FAMILY...and YOU KNOW WHAT GOD IS ASKING OF YOU...and if it means that you decide not to own something, or view something, or do something because you feel its BEST for your marriage, your children, your education, or your family and faith life...THEN STAND BY THAT and BE WHO YOU ARE...do not worry what others think and do not worry that you are "depriving" your children of anything. Most often, you will find that these things are not even an issue for your kids...until someone MAKES it an issue. (The mother I mentioned earlier in this post knew her son's personality was such that he had a compulsion toward addictive behavior and she felt that owning these games would have a far more negative impact upon him rather than a positive one...yet she was doubting herself because of outside opinions)

If you want to own a WII...own one....
If you don't want television in your home...get rid of it...
If you wish to enroll in a cyber-curriculum....do so
If you like to design your own lesson plans...get started today!
If you choose only educational films for your family....so be it

Decide WHO YOU ARE AS A FAMILY....and BE who you are!

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A Thankful Woman's Book of Blessings has two memes today, and one of them is BRAND NEW!
Click the Horn of Plenty in my sidebar to visit!

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Need some Quiet Time Reflections for your daily prayer life? CLICK THE ROSES IN MY SIDEBAR to find new meditations for EVERY day!



Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Slow and Steady (You Know the Rest!)

We have some Little Ones who REALLY don't feel well here in our house this week.

As we tend to their needs and try to comfort them, we have taken on a slower pace with
our school lessons...covering the essentials and taking time to enjoy some creative learning experiences together.

We are playing card games of Colors and Shapes, reading lots of stories, watching National Geographic Animal Videos about Polar Bears, Lion Cubs, and Baby Coyotes, and, thanks to the creative ideas from Ruth, at Daily Divine blog, we are also making personal craft journals this week!

Each child is hard-at-work on his/her own unique journal...We will post a few sample pages when we are finished! (We would post the entire thing, but with 7 students , at 6 pages each...that would be 42 pictures!!!!! So...we'll just show you a nice arrangement of them, ha ha!)

MOCK TACOS is the supper delight for this evening; made by our wonderful resident 12 year old Chef Jacob! (You can find this recipe by visiting HERE and scrolling down the page just a little bit!)

And I found this AMAZING little item on Ruth's blog also (You guys really need to visit Ruth's interesting blog, LOL)...I have NEVER seen anyone fold a shirt so quickly and neatly in my whole life! CLICK HERE and scroll down about three items on the page to enjoy this video!

Stop by A Thankful Woman's Book of Blessings if you can, to see today's memes:
Hearts for Home, and Pondering Pages!

The November newsletter is almost ready for publishing at Homeschool Faith and Family Life!
Sign up for a new FREE subscription now and you'll be included in this month's mailing!

Hope you are remembering to slow down and let the kids enjoy some coloring, pasting, cutting, reading, strolling, dreaming, napping, climbing, cooking, and playing! These are all WONDERFUL learning experiences and add many blessings to the homeschooling family!



Monday, November 2, 2009

Set Attainable Goals

This WELCOME goes out to BENMAKESTEN'S newest friend: "munchesmom"! Thanks for joining our happy little group! I look forward to your visits and have already been enjoying my OWN visits to YOUR blog as you know! Make yourself at home here and don't be a stranger to our comments...we LOVE to hear from you!


For those who homeschool, this time of year can begin to get pretty busy...seasons have changed (and with that came a host of re-organizing and storage activities) and plans for the upcoming holiday seasons are beginning to flurry about in our minds. Many homeschoolers like to "wrap things up" and reach a spot where they can "tone it down" and enter into the Advent and Christmas seasons ahead with a prayerful focus...tending more toward the spiritual and less toward the academic. Yet, we also understand that our formal school lessons are important and we want to keep offering a quality education to our children while we prepare for some of these other customs, traditions, ceremonies, and festivities as well.

So...how do we do it all? How do we keep up with school AND inspire our families toward the TRUE meaning of the holy season ahead?

SET ATTAINABLE GOALS!

This little tip is worth an elephant's weight in gold to me for many were the times in my early years of homeschooling when I wanted SO MUCH to get done that I would end up getting NOTHING done instead. Years of experience and prayer and mentoring from those wiser than myself have shown me that it's not so important HOW MUCH you want to accomplish, as it is that WHAT you accomplish be worthwhile to the "BIG PICTURE" of your home, school, and family life.

An example of this would be a well-meaning mom who sets the (often unattainable) goal for herself and her student of "working 3/4 of the way through the Math book by Christmas break".
That sounds good and note-worthy...however, when that particular student struggles in understanding concepts, this type of lofty goal can be nothing more than a recipe for daily frustration and tears on the parts of BOTH the student AND the mother!!!

SETTING ATTAINABLE GOALS for that family might mean that instead of trying to tackle almost the entire Math book before the holidays...mom simply resolves to make sure that her child understands the CONCEPT of fractions before they end classes for vacation. When a student is struggling, and a mother knows just where he/she is having a problem, then homeschooling becomes a great blessing because instead of just "pushing that child along" to "GET DONE", they can work together with a daily focus on the concept-in-question and spend all the time needed to help the student truly grasp it before moving forward. It is better that when the holidays arrive, the child knows what 3/4 of something really means and how to go about finding out what 3/4 of something is...rather than just being able to say that you finished a certain amount of lessons in the book without any real understanding having taken place.

SET ATTAINABLE GOALS:

EVERY subject does NOT need to be done EVERY day. Perhaps you have a few things that you wish to focus on each day of the week...(choose those things wisely as to where the individual needs of the student and family lie)...but then take the other subjects and divide them up...maybe Science will be three times a week, and History twice...OR...perhaps you will study Sciences the first part of the year and History the second...By not overloading the daily schedule, you actually create MORE time to study indepth and gain a better mastery of skills and understanding. You will also leave more time available for keeping up on your household duties and other scheduled events because lessons will not take as long if you are not trying to cram 7-8 subjects into every single school day!

SET ATTAINABLE GOALS:

Laundry, cooking, dusting, mopping...all are needed but NOT all are needed EVERY day.
Decide what is most important to you as a family...what helps create the most peace and harmony in the atmosphere of your home...for some people, clean carpets are a MUST...while others can not stand clutter in the kitchen sink. Do the things that matter most to you and leave the others for one day a week. (For us, that day is Friday, as we have designed a four-day school week, with Fridays left open for further research and extra curricular learning; as well as household cleaning and catching up with chores and duties)

For grading and lesson planning:

Again...if you set a goal that fits your state-in-life, it will be less stressful and more plausible that you will ATTAIN that goal. If you have a newborn in the house and three toddlers besides, then chances are YOU CAN NOT GRADE PAPERS EVERY NIGHT. Assess your personal situation and set a goal according to its needs. Grading papers every other night might help...or once a week...with lessons planned weekly or monthly as per your preference.

ENJOY YOUR TIME WITH YOUR CHILDREN IN YOUR STUDIES...remember WHY you homeschool in the first place...it is not to gain outside recognition...it is not to win some sort of "we have done the most lessons" race...and it is not so that others approve or validate your choices and accomplishments...it most likely is because you feel that teaching your children at home allows them the opporutnity to reach their full potential as an educated child of God in a safe environment where you can provide enriching, interesting, and challenging studies for them, while growing closer as a family and hopefully, growing closer to the Lord each and every day.

SET GOALS that work in harmony with that idea...It does not matter if the homeschooling family down the street finishes the text book and you do not...what matters is:

1) Are your children learning?
2) Are YOU learning?
3) Are the children progressing in their mastery of skills and understanding of concepts presented?
4) Are they maturing?
5) Are they growing in spirit and emotional health as well as intellectually?
6) Are they developing a spirit of generous and joyful service to others?
7) Are you pleased with your OWN family's accomplishments?

Discern what God wants from YOUR family...and SET YOUR GOALS accordingly!

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MOVIE MONDAY ( a review)


This classic is one of our favorites!

Where the Red Fern Grows, a great BOOK as well as a film is the story
of a young boy who learns what it means to "meet God half way".

Family devotion, integrity, hard-work, and a few tough lessons learned along the way makes this a timeless enjoyment for the whole family.

NOTE: There is one scene where a fight occurs between several boys and a fatal injury is impacted. Parents should use their own discretion as to whether or not their child is mature enough to handle that scene.

You can find this movie by clicking the Feature Films for Families link in my sidebar OR by getting it at our online store here: Homeschool Faith and Family Life Store

We hope you enjoy our Movie Monday reviews and we would LOVE to have you share your ideas in the comments box if your family has a recommendation for us!

Saturday, October 31, 2009

HAPPY ALL HALLOWS EVE!

May each of your families a safe, joyful, and happy holiday and HOLY DAY this weekend!

Do you do any special decorating for Halloween or All Saint's Day? Take a few photos and link us to them or just leave a comment sharing your decorating stories with us here on benmakesten!

Here are a few pictures of our own decorations:








Tomorrow is the great feast of ALL SAINTS DAY!!! I will not be posting then, but will return here on Monday! In honor of ALL SAINTS DAY...you can use the "search this blog" bar in my right-hand sidebar to re-visit a past post where I listed some of my own favorite Saints...real people who lived normal every-day lives, with faults and sins and ups and downs just like the rest of us...In that post, I shared what inspires me about each of the SAINTS that I chose...and in the comments you can read the favorite Saints of other readers. Feel free to link us to a new post on YOUR favorite Saints or leave a comment under THIS post sharing your ideas!

If you'd like to read more about this special holy day in the Catholic Church, CLICK HERE!

Note: You will notice in that article that it mentions "miracles" being associated with certain people who have gone to their final rest before us. As always, I like to clarify certain terms and the meanings that we, as Catholics attribute to those things in order to offer my non-Catholic friends a better explanation than I feel is sometimes given in these articles. When it is stated that "miracles" are attributed to these Saints...it does NOT mean that we believe, in ANY way, that humans or Saints in Heaven are capable of ANY power or MIRACLE unto themselves...it does mean, however, that we believe that sometimes Our LORD will use His people ...or accept their prayers and intercession on behalf of another...to show HIS OWN POWER and work miracles through the prayers and lives of others. GOD is the ONLY ONE capable of working miracles...and saying that a miracle is attributed to a certain person (from the Catholic perspective) simply means that someone here on earth prayed and asked someone who has gone before us to PRAY FOR US...and after having said those prayers...God sent a miracle to those lives. I hope that helps explain our belief. ::SMILE::


Friday, October 30, 2009

FRIDAY FOR OTHERS

I welcome you to leave a comment here today, asking for whatever prayer intentions might be in your heart...

I ask all benmakesten readers to take a moment to read the comments and offer a prayer for all of the intentions listed...THANK YOU! The power of prayer is far-reaching and we are all connected
in our intercessions for one another!

Please also join me in praying for:

1) My Dad, who will be having a bone marrow test on the 23rd...that the Lord will guide the hands of all of those who are caring for him, and that He will lead them to the answers needed to help him...WE PRAY TO THE LORD.......LORD, HEAR OUR PRAYER!

2) For all of those contemplating abortion...that they will be touched by the sacredness of LIFE and will be given the courage to spare the life of their unborn child...and also, that they will find people to help them, especially if they are in a crisis situation...WE PRAY TO THE LORD.....LORD, HEAR OUR PRAYER!

3) For all of the families and children who will be celebrating and/or walking the streets of their towns this weekend....that they will have a safe and joyful holiday and holy day....WE PRAY TO THE LORD....LORD, HEAR OUR PRAYER!

4) For the women on the Homeschool Lounge who have pleaded for prayers to heal their hurting marriages....and for ALL married couples....that CHRIST will be made the center of their vocations....and that He will bring healing and restoration to all of those who need it.....WE PRAY TO THE LORD.....LORD, HEAR OUR PRAYER!

5) For families who have loved ones overseas in the service of our nation....that they will be sustained through the love, prayers, and help of others while their family members are away....WE PRAY TO THE LORD....LORD, HEAR OUR PRAYER!

6) For SAHMinIL (a follower of this blog) and her family....that they will recuperate from their illness and that the upcoming surgery her sweet son needs will be a success....WE PRAY TO THE LORD.....LORD, HEAR OUR PRAYER! (Visit Nikki's blog to learn more about her son Superstar and his surgery, so that you can keep him in your intentions)

Please take a few moments of silence to lift these intentions to the Lord today...and add your OWN prayers and petitions by leaving them in a comment under this post....or by linking us to a post of your own intentions on your blog or website.

Look down upon us, Heavenly Father, and by the merits of Your Son, Our Lord, Jesus Christ, in whose name we do pray...HEAR OUR PRAYERS and COME TO ALL IN THEIR HOUR OF NEED...we thank You and praise You for Your goodness...NOW AND FOREVER.....

AMEN!



Christian Glitter by www.christianglitter.com

Thank you for visiting BENMAKESTEN today!


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This is especially for "GOD AMONG US"...the newest follower of BENMAKESTEN! I am VERY glad to have you here with us and look forward to seeing you in the comments!!! I am really honored to have "GOD AMONG US" here with us as she is a blogger with 591 followers!!!! THAT'S IMPRESSIVE!!!! Readers can click the first avatar in the upper left corner of "Friends of Benmakesten" (at the top of the page) and pop on over to GOD AMONG US for a visit today!